Gabatron Morning Briefing – 7-12-16: The Great Pokemon Hunt

Thanks for taking a break from Amazon Prime Day to read some of my snarky comments…

We’ve all seen eyeroll-inducing stories about Pokemon Go this week. Stories have ranged from annoyances to people actually being robbed while they were distracted by their phones. Now the Holocaust Museum in Washington, DC has been forced to ask visitors to put down their phones and stop chasing Pokemon in there.

Taylor Swift is the top-earning celebrity in the world. She earned an estimated $170 million in the past year, driven in part by her very successful 1989 World Tour. Swift more than doubled her take from last year, when she earned $80 million. If aliens landed on Earth tomorrow, how would we explain that?

A new survey says 62% of Americans don’t have at least $1,000 in savings. I currently do, but obviously that won’t be holding up for long… or will it?

Bernie Sanders has officially endorsed Hillary Clinton for President in 2016. So that means he’s finally done, right? The whole “Feel The Bern” movement gets talked up a lot, but keep in mind that if it weren’t for the Republican nominee, Hillary Clinton would be the least-liked Presidential candidate in history, and he couldn’t beat her.

Meanwhile on the other side of the aisle, Donald Trump tweeted about violence while he was on his way to Chicago for a fundraiser. Violence is always cromulent when you’re talking about Chicago. He said he’s going to make America safe again for everyone. So we have that to look forward to. Why didn’t any of our elected officials every think about just making thing safe again? Sad.

Cubs stud Kris Bryant says he’s never had an alcoholic drink in his life. He’s 24 years old. Luckily, he plays in Chicago so the fans are willing to pick up the slack.

Tim Duncan has decided to call it a career after 19 seasons in the NBA. The NBA kind of lost my after Jordan’s second retirement ended the Bulls dynasty, which actually makes this one significant even for me because Duncan was one of very few players from that era still playing. You have to be impressed by the way both he and the Spurs stayed together all these years. It’s rare in sports and even in life, I’ve had three employers in the last 2 years.

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