Gabatron Morning Briefing – 3-10-16: The Red Line Vigilante

A man from Rogers Park here in Chicago has been arrested for using a cell phone jammer on the Red Line. He faces one felony count of unlawful interference with a public utility. He says he only did it because he gets “irritated by people constantly on their phones” on public transportation. Hero or jerk? If you’re riding the train with someone, talk to them. If not, leave everyone else alone.

A Chicago-area dad decided it was a good idea to place an ad in the magazine “Christianity Today” looking for a husband for his “virgin daughter.” He describes his daughter as a “godly, gorgeous, athletic, educated, careered, humorous, travelled and bi-lingual 26-year-old virgin.” The editor has since removed it from their web edition. He says it’s inappropriate, because trying to “market your daughter” is demeaning and the ad never should have been allowed.

Marco Rubio told an NBC townhall meeting that he regrets engaging in personal attacks against Donald Trump. He says that his kids were embarrassed by it, and if he had it to do over again, he wouldn’t have done it.

The NHL has closed their investigation into the allegations against Patrick Kane. They’ve concluded that the allegations against him were “unfounded.”

Mike Ditka is out as an analyst for NFL Countdown on ESPN. He did however sign a 2-year contract to be a contributor for Sports Center. The demotion just happened to coincide with him Ditka calling President Obama the worst President in history. Both sides say it was a mutual decision, though.

President Obama’s doctor says that he’s in “great health”. He is still using nicotine gum though. The man is the leader of the free world, let him smoke.

The death of Beatles hanger-oner George Martin caused a brief moment of panic in the geek community on Thursday. Some less than observant viewers believe that Game of Thrones creator George R.R. Martin was actually the one who died. He posted online several hours later that he was still very much alive, and still working on cranking out another Game of Thrones book or two.

Dos Equis has decided to dump actor Jonathan Goldsmith, who had been playing the Most Interesting Man in the World. They say they are making the change to appeal to younger drinkers. Goldsmith has been playing the part for years. They’ve already picked his replacement, but haven’t announced who it is yet

Keith Conrad got his first job in radio in Huntsville, Alabama the day after the 2000 Presidential election when he was a freshman in college. He’s produced radio shows in Huntsville, Milwaukee, WI, Atlanta, GA and finally back in his hometown of Chicago. Currently he lives in Chicago’s Edgewater neighborhood steps away from the Red Line. The train goes by so often you don’t even notice it. Keith has been dabbling in the Internet arts for a while now, in various roles both professional and just for fun.

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