Gabatron Morning Briefing – 1-18-16: Alternative Financial Aid

A website that helps young women find dirty old men for “alternative financial aid” says NYU and Arizona State are their biggest customers. They’ll actually allow any young ladies looking for a sugar daddy to register, but they offer a special discount to anyone using a “.edu” address to register, which allows them to see which schools have students making use of their services.

CPS teachers won’t be facing any layoffs this week. Central office workers might not be so lucky, they might be shown the door at some point this week.

Thieves in Chicago are getting more brazen and creative. A man followed a person back to their room at the Congress Plaza Hotel, then robbed them at gunpoint. There were actually five people in the room, all of whom were robbed. That’s not going to help the board of tourism.

During the Cubs Convention over the weekend, the team announced that there will be metal detectors at all entrances. They are advising people to just plan on arriving early from now on when they go to games. The Cubs would also like to look at the idea of closing Clark and Addison during games to give a little bit of a buffer against any would-be security threats. At this point it seems like any gathering of people could be a target for someone, do you find yourself looking over your shoulder when you go to an event with a big group of people?

One of the Oregon refuge occupiers has been arrested. He decided it was a good idea to go on a grocery run with one of the government vehicles from the wildlife refuge. You can’t do that, it’s literally stealing.

Error in Judgement: A US Air Force base in Georgia had to apologize after someone started putting up posters for an “MLK Day Fun Shoot”

SNL did a send up of the Republican debate for their cold open. Among other things, Ted Cruz explained why it’s crazy talk to say that he’s a Canadian.

President Obama is calling the deal with Iran and release of the 4 American prisoners a victory for “strong American diplomacy.” He says that we’ve accomplished more in a few months of talking than we did with years of sanctions.

Keith Conrad got his first job in radio in Huntsville, Alabama the day after the 2000 Presidential election when he was a freshman in college. He’s produced radio shows in Huntsville, Milwaukee, WI, Atlanta, GA and finally back in his hometown of Chicago. Currently he lives in Chicago’s Edgewater neighborhood steps away from the Red Line. The train goes by so often you don’t even notice it. Keith has been dabbling in the Internet arts for a while now, in various roles both professional and just for fun.

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